Cinderella: Fairytales for Commoners

“And I’m only a lizard, not a footman. Enjoy it while it lasts.”

Cinderella. Indeed. Impossible waists aside, here we go.

First things first, let me just say it’s always such a joy to see Hayley Atwell working. She lights up the slightly disappointing start of this movie. That just carries on being slightly disappointing, unfortunately.

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From the get go, when her father tells her he found someone else, it just made me cringe for a bit and wonder if she was too green for this. It seems all, well, quite forced. Lily James certainly has the looks to pull off a Cinderella, yet her facial expressions are extremely repetitive. Not that Ella is a well of emotion, but even the animated version with a freaking red chunky line for a mouth showed me more than this, honestly.
Think of it. Cinderella’s story is pretty fucked up. We know this is a simple and kind girl, but she goes through some pretty powerful shit. I just saw the same empty look and artificial watery eyes over and over again. If we’re taking a chance on going live action on this, maybe we could take that emotional leap. Apparently, nope. The movie just matures in male genitalia accuracy (Those damn pants, gosh).
Well, that was rough, let’s have courage and be kind here: I saw no brilliant work. But, keep pushing it Lils, I seriously believe there is some potential.

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Cate Blanchett is simply awesome. Basically, the usual. It’s actually pretty nice to be aware of this villainess’ struggles. I honestly believe that the way Disney is finally getting into this, with movies like Maleficent, is actually pretty nice. The complexity to a villain’s story can, most of the times, be an extremely interesting point of view to take on (Not that I believe Maleficent is a great movie, I can get you some words on that one if you like, I’m just saying the intent sounds pretty good).

“For everything you must pay, pay, pay. Love is not free.”
I think I’ve made myself clear.

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Oh, what about the ball? We can’t get into this movie properly without addressing that. Everyone that actually possesses a heart couldn’t possibly get pass this scene without feeling that little hint of serendipity. I felt it, specially because it was one of the few scenes not colored with a filthy load of CGI.
C’mon. Maybe this scene lasted a while longer than it should have. Who cares.

But going back to the computer-generated imagery thing (Pretentious, much, hein?), isn’t it just a shame the way they pulled this out with a bunch of stuff that wasn’t actually there? Why take it to live action to make half of it on a computer? Imagine turning all those green screens into actual sets, what a great opportunity, just wasted. I’m perfectly aware of how unrealistic it sounds to turn a big bucks production into a legit thing (I’m not saying CGI is not legit, it can be great work, I’m just wondering: why make animation out of animation while trying to turn it into live action? Frankly, I’m simply bummed this couldn’t be made in actual sets, I’m a hopeless set romantic, forgive my fossil ways).
To sum it up: All the CGI makes it look completely fake. What’s the point of going live action if it still looks like a cartoon? They lost the opportunity to make set wonders out of this.

Let me just add, since we’re going into the technical work here, wardrobe? Not impressed. The gowns are pretty good looking sure, but, meh. And, on a very important side note: That buldge is uncomfortable for everyone. And could have been avoyded. C’mon, it’s a fairytale, no one cares about period costumes accuracy. The same goes for Cate Blanchet’s bras.

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That said, he has a special secret place for a swing? How old is he? Five? This is the strangest mating ritual on the history of picking up chicks. Besides, she runs away from him and he still demands too see her again. Mr. Grey much? I’m kidding.

Kenneth Branagh just sends me to crazy town on these jumping close ups and the constant spy mode. Let’s not kid ourselves, the movie looks pretty nice. But, is it really everything it could be? I doubt it.
Take the King’s Death Scene. I just think it might have been a good idea to change positions, bring them both into the frame, not have us jumping around from one face to the other. They’re sharing a moment, you should have them speaking to us and reacting at the same time, live feed, you know, live reactions, live emotions, live action. Not this touched up crap. Yes, they’re faces are flawless, but that’s not the point, is it? That one last moment, where he lies beside his father is just precious, we could have had more of that.
And the roll of scenes in which we’re watching them from behind something just seems unnecessary. It’s a storytelling tool, certainly. But, it’s not really needed here and it takes away from the visual impact (Doesn’t it? Am I the only one feeling quite strongly about this?).

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Basically, an attempt to make a couple more  bucks from a classic, that shall never get the same magic the original has. Because that’s just impossible (I know, you all know that). And they can go ahead and remake them all, the result will always be the same.

But, in the end, the slipper fits. And that’s all that matters. Isn’t it?

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